Eric Molloy is a post-irony, pre-Millennial, post-X'er, pre-ego. He currently lives in Tribeca, NYC in a loft with four other arty-types. He recently graduated from NYU undergrad, but has absolutely no interest/drive to do anything with a $120K education. Aside from being a regular contributor to McSweeney's Internet Tendancy, he is starting a weekly (sometimes more often due to his increasingly empty schedule) blog here at REMAIN ALERT to show us that it is WE who define the lists, not the other way around.
'Things not to mention on a first date'
by eric molloy
(lowercase)
1. I didn't brush my teeth last week.
2. I masturbate to Jodie Sweeten on "Full House" reruns on Nick at Nite.
3. I killed a man in Reno once...
4. I don't like sushi.
5. I sometimes poop in my pants and act like nothing happened, so as to make it a game. GAME ON.
6. I eat my own skin after I peel.
7. I have a blog.
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